Don’t rob a bank. But if you do, don’t leave a receipt. And definitely don’t drive a minivan with a baby seat. Your Cheerio crumbs will betray you.
Also, if your name is Gary, stay home. Just watch a heist movie instead. It’s cheaper. And you’ll still be free to pet your cat—even if it’s named Mr. Whiskers.
So next time you hear “160 years for twelve men,” don’t think “tragedy.” Think “cautionary tale with a side of cereal.” And maybe, just maybe, laugh a little. The guys in prison would. Well, except for the one who snorted. He’s still doing extra time.
