If you want a war where people actually died—constantly—look at the Arauco War between the Spanish Empire and the Mapuche people in Chile. It started in 1536. It lasted over 300 years. The Spanish tried to conquer them; the Mapuche said, “Nah, we’re good.” By the time it fizzled out in the 19th century, Chile was an independent country, and the Mapuche were still fighting for their land. Spoiler alert: they lost most of it.
But that one’s grim. Let’s stick with the funny, bureaucratic version of the longest war, okay?
10 Longest Wars in History - 10Fantastic.com
The Peace Treaty That Finally Arrived
In 1986, a historian named Roy Duncan noticed the Scilly–Netherlands war was still technically active. He contacted the Dutch ambassador. A peace treaty was signed on April 17, 1986, with no hard feelings and a lot of embarrassed laughter. The Dutch ambassador joked, “It must be a comfort to the Scillonians to know we could have attacked at any moment.” Talk about holding a grudge for the ages.
The war officially ended, but the islanders celebrated with free beer and a ceremony. I mean, can you blame them? They’d been under threat of a Dutch naval invasion for three and a half centuries—but only on paper.
